BVOV Magazine 2013 - present

Ken and I started seeing each other every weekend. He had just started work at an airport only about 40 miles from my school. He would fly his old, rickety airplane over and buzz the dorm, and I would go meet him at the airport. All the girls were really impressed. The next semester I quit school, moved to Little Rock and got a job. I lived with my grandmother. Ken moved to Little Rock and went to work until we were married at his boss’s home less than six months after our first date. He borrowed $100 and took me all the way to Hot Springs, Ark., 53 miles away. Years later, I was back at that penthouse in Little Rock where I’d first met Ken. While I was there, I noticed the strangest thing. There wasn’t a window that could have caused the light I’d seen around him. In fact, there was no source of light that explained that glow. Ken later told me that there was a light around me when he opened the door. I’ve wondered many times over the years if it was a sign from God. There’s certainly no question that when Ken and I married, we began a journey that led us both to the Light of the world. “When I opened my heart enough for Gloria, Jesus came knocking.” —Kenneth I fought deep, dark depression for years before I was born again. The oppression finally became so heavy that I had no emotional response to anyone in my life. I didn’t have any expression of love toward anyone. Not even toward my parents! There was nobody on the face of the earth that I had any emotional feeling for. I was mad at the world, and mad at my parents. I didn’t want them coming around. I didn’t want anyone hanging around. Now, if someone wanted to brag on me, I’d tolerate them for a while. But the first time they crossed me—they were history. Don’t misunderstand, I told people I loved them. But it was a con. I might tell a woman I loved her, but I would never sing to one. I could stand up on a stage and sing to a crowd, but the thought of singing to a woman was beyond me. Why? Because it was an expression of love. Back then I honestly believed that there was no such thing as real love. In fact, just a few days before I met Gloria I said to someone, “I really don’t believe love is a real thing. I think it’s just some kind of state of mind. And if it is real, then I’m incapable of it.” There’s no such thing as a human being incapable of love. That’s a spiritual impossibility, but I didn’t know it. A few days later, I met Gloria and fell in love with her the minute I saw her. This is different! I realized. Every idea I’d ever had about love flew out the window. On my first date with Gloria I found myself singing to her. Whooh! Man, this is something, I thought when I caught myself. I hadn’t planned on singing. I wasn’t trying to impress her or con her into something. I just couldn’t help it. I knew right then that I wanted to marry this woman. I figured it would take me a year to talk her into it, so I decided to get an early start. I didn’t know what it would take to get her to marry me, but I was ready to lie, cheat, steal or con to make it happen. I really thought, This is going to take a long time—maybe years—to win her over, so I’m going to ask her now. After our date, I walked her up to the front porch and opened the door. “Gloria,” I said. She turned around and looked at me. “Will you marry me?” She said, “Yes—I will.” Then she turned around and went inside the house and closed the door. Left me standing there stammering and muttering in disbelief. God opened the door of my heart with love. When I opened my heart enough for Gloria, Jesus came knocking. Sure enough, not too long after that, I let Him in. V BVOV : 11

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